People on an Airplane

This is a post dedicated to the annoying people on an airplane. Also known as your ideal flight from hell. 

A.

1. You're old

2. You're old and grumpy

3. You're old, grumpy, AND take up 2 seats.

B.

1. You're foreign (*cough*EU) and don't know the social norms. (My family are all foreigners, but we know how to fly without being the most annoying people on a flight.) You'd think that flying across an ocean taught you how to act on an airplane.

2. Speaking across aisles and seats in another language because you were too incompetent to book seats together. 

3. Constantly asking people to move because you couldn't book seats next to each other. 

C. 

1. You're a child under the age of 12. 

2. You're a gross little being touching every hole on your head & touching things. 

3. You're a youngin, gross, AND loud.  

Ladies and gentleman, we are now ready for take off. 

Best wishes, 

E

{written on a flight from CLT ✈ MIA at 32,000 feet}